10.20.15

For most of the third trimester, I didn't think I'd make it past 39 weeks. Well…October 14 came and went, I started maternity leave, and LT seemed content to stay put in my belly!
Monday October 19, I went for my last OB checkup. The doctor said I was ~4cm and 50% effaced, great progress for a first time mom. I found out after the fact that the nurse & doctor believed I'd have a baby in the next 24 hours! 
That night, contractions started but very mild & sporadic. Since they were all in my back and not really worse than the back pain I'd been dealing with for months, we didn't really pay attention. 
We finally got in bed after midnight and turned out the lights around 1ish. At 1:30, it was unmistakable…my water broke! I bolted out of bed faster than I'd moved in weeks. Adam rushed to the bathroom to find me laughing 😂 not sure why that reaction other than OMG, we're really truly having a baby - and soon! I texted the on-call doctor letting him know what happened. Typically your water breaking doesn't mean you need to head in right away and since I hadn't been contracting regularly, I was in no hurry. I knew I could get an epidural as soon as I got to the hospital so why rush? Plus I was determined to take a shower since who knew how long I'd be in labor. 
Well those contractions started basically immediately, and they came fast & furious. I took a quick shower and since it was cold out insisted on blow drying my hair. My poor husband, who hates to see me hurting, was watching me stop the dryer every couple minutes to breathe, sway, squat, every damn thing we learned in birthing class. Well none of that shit works, just so you know! Sweating from the pain, I walked out of the house in summer clothes & we left for the longest 8 minute drive ever.
Doc had told L&D I'd be in eventually with a broken water bag, but they weren't expecting me so soon (about 3am). Once the monitors were hooked up, they understood why - my contractions were every two minutes, lasting a minute. It didn't take long to get an iv started and thankfully, middle of the night = anesthesiology wasn't busy. By about 4, I had my epidural. Nothing gets you past the fear of a giant needle going into your spine quite like labor contractions! I didn't even notice that it had to be done twice because it wasn't in the right spot at first. It was hard to think of anything but the pain.  
Once my epidural kicked in, there wasn't much to do but wait. I got the shakes pretty bad, a normal side effect, so I wasn't really able to sleep much. We'd decided not to have anyone else at the hospital with us also, a decision I'm still happy with. It was an amazing bonding time for Adam and I. 

Around 11am, my nurse checked to find me 9cm. It was almost time! With no idea what to expect, I was nervous, scared, and excited. An hour later I started pushing. Pushing is hard work! The epidural was wearing off a little and after a few contractions, I knew when to push without checking the monitor. I had a nurse on one side and Adam on the other. I can't praise my husband enough for his role in my entire labor. He was loving, encouraging, attentive, determined, everything I wanted and needed. He was my strength. 
After two hours, my doctor offered me a break. Take 15 minutes or so to rest, gather some strength to finish pushing and bring our son into the world. She also mentioned that if things didn't start progressing more, we might have to discuss other options. Well, that did it for me. No way were they cutting my baby out of me if I could help it! At 2:57pm, time ceased to exist. Everything stopped. Adam told me to look down, and there he was. My son. 
I wish the next part was about our first skin-to-skin and maybe even feeding, but it's not. When baby's head delivered, his cord was wrapped twice around his neck. Doctor quickly cut it, but the stress of struggling for air & poor blood flow already affected LT. His adrenaline kicked in and that threw off his blood sugars. My sweet perfect baby boy was taken to the NICU. It was a few hours before I could see him and have that skin-to-skin and a few more before he was released & could stay in the room with us, but we were just glad he was ok! 
Overall, minus the cord scare and NICU stay, I'm happy with our birth story. The doctor I work for in-office delivered for us, the nurse was amazing, and my husband was perfect. And now, we're three 💙 and I love my little family more than words could ever say. Every single thing you read about birth, motherhood, the maternal bond, unconditional love…it doesn't even scratch the surface. When my little man looks up at me with his big dark eyes - I am overwhelmed with emotion. 
Parenting is hard, but this little guy truly is our greatest adventure. And we can handle anything when we handle it together ❤️

204 More Days!

I'm 11 weeks today! Mostly excited because that means I'm almost through the first trimester. I'm looking forward to getting some energy back and feeling like myself again. The best thing ever is the arrival of THIS:

My Snoogle!

Getting comfortable at night is already an impossibility and I know as my tummy grows, it's only going to get harder.

(Tiny insight into the night of a pregnant lady: stayed up "late" and fell asleep by 10:30ish. Woke up at 3am to pee; also had an excruciating headache - so bad I took Tylenol, which I refrain from if at all possible. Then tossed & turned, trying not to wake my husband, for over an hour. Fell back to sleep after 4am. Only one pee break was a gift, I guess. I'm lucky to have such a sweet, understanding bedmate!)
This week we discovered I can't stand the smell of garlic. I still don't have the dreaded morning sickness so I sorta feel like I shouldn't complain about the symptoms I do have, but man! I basically feel like I was hit by a truck, all the time. Daily headaches on top of sheer exhaustion and a general 'blah' feeling. Sleeping is my best friend and difficult to get. Adam can testify to some SLIGHT;) moodiness as well.
But it truly is the best reason to feel like crap :)

We've started some baby steps (see what I did there?) towards getting ready for baby. I got some maternity clothes (!) (more on that later) and we opened a bank account for Lil Trout. My mom is trying to plan my baby shower already! Five more weeks until we find out boots or bows and we can't wait!

Ten Weeks!

Today marks 10weeks with Lil Trout :) On Monday, we had our first official OB appointment. Lots of education for Adam! ;) 

The highlight was obviously seeing our lil fishy (who totally waved at us) and hearing the heartbeat. 

I can't tell you how full my heart was hearing that with my wonderful sweet supportive husband squeezing my hand. It's starting to feel real! Seeing our teeny little baby wiggling around - there are no words. 

I'm still relatively symptom-free, with a few exceptions: totally exhausted, frequent killer headaches, super sensitive to smells, and while I actually can't eat as much as I could before (much to my husband's disappointment) I get queasy if I go hungry too long. Other than that, I feel pretty good - I am very much looking forward to that alleged second trimester energy burst though!

Now - too many weeks until we find out if Lil Trout is a boy or girl. It's anyone's guess! We have something special in store for that news :)

I've never been so happy, and that's saying a lot. Much love!

I Promise

I promise I'm not a slacker - it's been a really busy 2015 so far but I am working on an EPIC post for this little blog!

Stay tuned!

Bursting with Excitement!

2.15.15

I know I won't be publishing this for a few weeks but I am just so freaking excited!

LIL TROUT IS ON HER (or his) WAY!!!

It's been a long road - a story I may tell later. But we're finally here, with our little bun in the oven!

I painted my mom a wine glass that read "Grandma's Sippy Cup, est. Oct. 2015" and her reaction when she realized what we were telling her was epic. Priceless. The best thing ever! 

On my husband's mother's birthday, one of her presents will be a binky with a note attached asking her to save it for visits with her newest grandbaby. THEN we can tell the world! It will be sooner than the advised 12 weeks but after all we've been through, I can't wait that long!

I'm just over four weeks right now and the only symptom is insomnia! But that might be partly due to rambunctious kitties and sheer excitement. We'll be watching my hCG levels this week and scheduling an ultrasound soon - I can't wait till my baby's little heart starts beating. 

2.16.15

I had my second quant this morning an am anxiously awaiting the results! Working in obstetrics means I am all too familiar with the uncertainty in early pregnancy. I am trying my best to keep positive! Every night, my sweet husband talks to the baby and prays for his or her safe arrival into the world. 

Update: 727! That means my hCG has been doubling every two days which is exactly what's supposed to happen. I get checked again Wednesday and then we decide when my first ultrasound is - I'm pulling for next week. Once I see my lil Trout I'll feel so much better!

2.18.15

It's 4:30am and my darling kitties woke me up. So far I have very few pregnancy symptoms, the worst being sheer exhaustion and difficulty sleeping. But! Today marks five weeks, and Lil Trout will have a beating heart any day now! I am so excited for Adam to see and hear this. It's incredible to me every time I see it with a patient, and I still can't even believe *I* have a teeny tiny life inside me at this moment. I check all 9 of my pregnancy apps before email, Facebook, anything. Going to try to get some sleep before I head to the doctor for my final quant. This is all so exciting!

Wee Mail is one of the cutest apps, although less clinical than the others. 

My latest quant is perfect :) which means next week, ultrasound! It's a little early, 5w6d, but hopefully we'll be able to see Lil Trout's little heartbeat. We are so excited and overjoyed! It hasn't quite sunk in just yet…

2.19.15

It may not have sunk in, but my body knows. I feel like crap! I'm exhausted and have some sort of cold I can't kick. Add in the headaches and dizzy spells. Hoping I'm one of the lucky ones to bypass morning sickness. 

2.21.15

So far no morning sickness! Maybe it will never come. Headaches under control too. Lack of symptoms is actually worse though. I'm so scared because I'm well aware of what can go wrong and how often it happens. Two and a half days until our first ultrasound and I might die waiting! Tomorrow Adam and I are heading back to the city for a Flyers game so hopefully the distraction works! 

Prayers for Lil Trout.

2.22.15

Two more sleeps until our first ultrasound! I don't know how I'm going to keep this quiet - we're planning on telling his family at his mother's birthday dinner in two weeks and actually announcing on St. Patrick's Day (I got the cutest reveal shirt!) I just can't wait!!!

2.23.15

Our ultrasound is in less than 12 hours and to put it mildly - I am freaking out! It could be too early to see anything and all the clinical logic in the world won't stop me from being devastated. Or we could see twins and I might faint! I'm so exhausted all the time, I sure do wish I could sleep easily right now…

2.24.15

WE SAW HER! Our lil trout is in my belly and her little heart is beating at 108 bpm. She's measuring perfect at 5w6d and we go back in two weeks for another scan. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! I'm finally pregnant!

2.25.15

Can I just fast forward a few weeks? I'm so paranoid of every symptom, lack of symptom, belly cramp, everything! Stick, lol trout! We love you so much already. 

2.27.15

Every day that passes without the dreaded morning sickness is a very worrisome little blessing! I'm sneaking in a scan at work next week to make sure everything is ok before we tell Adam's family. Then we have our second official ultrasound and begin regular prenatal care! I'm still in shock. 

3.1.15

It's March! That means it's BABY ANNOUNCEMENT MONTH! St. Patrick's Day is going to be so special this year :) Next weekend is when we're telling Adam's mother; I'm sneaking in an "unofficial" ultrasound this week just to make sure things still look good. I'm SO excited :)))

3.4.15

Peeked at lil Trout again today :) looking good! It's amazing how much changed in a week! See for yourself…

3.6.15

Peeked at lil trout again today because I'm neurotic. All is well! Tomorrow we're telling Adam's family and soon, everyone!

3.9.25

So we told Adam's family this weekend. Pretty darn cute if I may say so myself!

Tomorrow we have another scan and then I'm officially an OB patient. Can't wait to actually see AND hear lil trout's heartbeat. Still feeling good, too - no morning sickness for this girl!

3.10.15

Today went great! Lil Trout is perfect. Heart rate at 175 :) I'm still feeling pretty good, except EXHAUSTED. Like, sit-down-to-dry-my-hair exhausted. Today I came home from work to the sweetest surprise from my hubby - who, by the way, is the most amazing man in the world. 

Lil Trout is already so loved. We feel blessed beyond belief. 

3.14.25

We can't wait any longer. Our family & close friends know; tomorrow it's going viral!

We can't contain our excitement any longer! HAPPY ST. PADDY'S DAY ALL!!!

3.15.15

The cat's out of the bag, time to hit publish! CHEERS!

Going Green

Let food be thy medicine, thy medicine shall be thy food. - Hippocrates

I've been inspired lately to treat my body better and keep my husband healthy so he's around a long, long time. It's tough because we love everything bad for you, red meat and cream sauces and cheesy pasta for days. Oh, and wine. No secret there! Alas, we're not getting any younger & there's no time like the present. In the spirit of things…here's my latest made-up delicacy.

Kale! Quinoa! Where has this stuff been all my life? I always knew the darker the greens the more nutrients, and kale is no exception. It's loaded with vitamins and potent anti-cancer properties. Quinoa is a protein-packed grain that is super easy to cook and incredibly versatile. Salads are such a simple meal; I made a huge bowl to get me through lunch all week. It's time-consuming; the quinoa needs to cook and chill, and the kale and other ingredients needed to be chopped teeny tiny. I added yellow pepper, dried cranberries (the plain Ocean Spray kind) and chopped honey roasted walnuts; you can honestly add whatever you like! Toss it all up and wa-la, lunch for days.

I use Panera Bread's Fuji Apple Vinaigrette dressing (because it's amazing and I'm addicted) and added some crumbled goat cheese - blue cheese would work well too, I think. 

I also made this super-easy tomato-basil-mozzarella salad with quinoa and it turned out so yummy, my steak-and-potatoes husband can't get enough!

Eating healthier is a bit more costly and time-consuming, but the rewards are immeasurable and priceless. Any excuse to try a new recipe is a plus!

Ciao, bella!

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Our final day in Florence was spent doing my absolute favorite things: shopping and relaxing! Trafalgar organized a demonstration at a leather shop - maybe you've heard of Peruzzi? After a fancy new belt for Adam, we wandered the streets checking out local and tourist shops. The early afternoon was spent in the possibly my favorite city square, Piazza San Croce. I bartered with street vendors for scarves, jewelry & trinkets. I people-watched with a glass of rosé while a local handmade me a namesake bracelet.

(Turns out, every time I took a step, my sweet hubby was muttering "stop buying stuff, stop buying stuff!" under his breath. Oh well!) Adam did get me a fun new charm for my Pandora bracelet - the fleur-de-lis, the symbol of Firenze, purchased at an outrageously priced jewelry store at the corner of the piazza.

My heart was heavy when it came time to hop on our bus and head back to Rome. It was the most magical week. But, the long bus rides were their own kind of fun!

When we arrived back in Rome, we checked in to the Executive Style Hotel Rome. This hotel has been completely remodeled since it's days of housing  Catholic priests. Super modern and fun! It was late September and about 85 degrees - no complaints here.

Our final dinner was a DELICIOUS meal at The Cabiria. 

Wine flowed and after several lazy courses, new friendships were cemented. Knowing we had to get up early to catch our flights to Heathrow and then Philly, we did the responsible thing…haha no we didn't we stayed up most of the night! Didn't make a difference, anyway…free drinks on the plane made sleeping through the flight a breeze even for my airplane-anxious husband. 

The crash after week of running on adrenaline didn't hurt. 

I could cry just reminiscing - it was the most amazing week. Every experience was that much more special because I got to share them all with my best friend, my partner, my favorite person in the world. We dream of going back, but know it's not necessarily likely. This truly was the trip of a lifetime. There is definitely more adventure to come in our life together - it's just  taking place on American soil for now ;)

Ciao, bella - fino alla prossima volta.

Lights, Camera, Action

For some moments in life, there are no words. - David Seltzer

I will openly admit I'm a social media junkie. I check in, post photos, accept friend requests from people I've met once. I #mcm my husband every single week and share #tbt pics from childhood through last week. I'm not delusional and don't consider 55 likes on my profile photo significant of anything useful in the real world, but it's fun. I'm nosy and voyeuristic. I have a blog, for Pete's sake! I play on Facebook and Instagram, both of which are private accounts. I had to delete a Twitter because it was too un-private. 

But I digress. I've been called "the most married woman on social media" by some friends/acquaintances. Hey, whatevs. I'm living a beautiful life & thrilled to share it. 

One thing I've heard is that if someone were truly happy, they wouldn't broadcast it on social media. That makes no sense to me; why would I hide that? Pretty sure those words come from bitter, jealous skeptics.

However. For every date night check-in, for every kissy-face photo, for every public declaration of love - there are hundreds of other moments. Private moments between a husband and wife, secrets shared in the dark. These are the glue in our marriage. Sure, y'all can peek in the window, but at the end of the day, the curtains are drawn and we exist in our own world. Don't ever think you are seeing all of someone's life via Instagram selfies and Buzzfeed shares. Social media is just the highlights reel - the real magic happens behind the scenes.

You don't know the half of it…

Breakfast at Tiffany's

There is something in the New York air that makes sleep useless. - Simone Beauvoir

I am absolutely NOT a city girl.* Ok, I lived in a teeny city for almost 8 years. But I hardly count that, it was necessity. I know a tiny bit about Philly, because what DelCo girl doesn't, but it's not a place I want to frequent. The first time I stepped out of Grand Central Station - I thought I might faint! It was my 21st birthday and to say the city overwhelmed me is putting it mildly.

Regardless, there's a certain something about the Big Apple. And at Christmastime! (Ok, I've ONLY been there at Christmastime. Lol.) So when the opportunity for a day trip in December came up, hubby & I jumped on it.
We hit Eataly, easily my favorite place in the city (take me back!) and wandered the streets hand in hand.

We hit the big spots - we kissed under the tree at Rockefeller Center, we shopped at the NHL store (ugh, bring that to Chester County!), and snacked at Hard Rock Cafe. 

Making memories with my husband is my favorite. And I came away with the PERFECT souvenir! 

He does, too. He wants me, he chose me, and he has me. Forever. 

*Foreign cities are a different story. Take me back to Venice, Madrid, Florence, Barcelona, and beyond!

Ciao, bella! (Part 5)

Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember and remember more than I have seen.

- Benjamin Disraeli 

(Told you I'd slack at this! But I'm almost through so…)

I left off in Garda. The next day, we hopped the bus to head to Florence. As much as I expected to fall head over heels in love with Venice, I was a bit surprised by how infatuated I was with Florence! It's this charming city full of art hidden on winding streets connecting open piazzas loaded with cafes…and then there's the shopping. I was in HEAVEN. Ladies, if you're a shopaholic, Firenze is your Mecca! And their specialty…leather goods. Hard to imagine buying a leather coat when it's 90* out! But I digress. One of our first stops after wandering the streets a bit was lunch. By far, the best meal I had in Italy! A teeny hole in the wall off a side street called Francesco Vini. We both had the most decadent, amazing food and, yes, wine! 

After lunch & a bit of exploring, we headed…There. What do you HAVE to see in Florence? Michaelangelo's David. 

Holy hell. Do you have any idea how HUGE that statue is? It's massive. The giant replica standing in the original location, the Palazzo della Signoria, doesn't even prepare you for the sight of the original. It's sitting on a up on a pedestal and stands, total, 17 feet tall! 

Not much else in the Galleria dell'Accademi interested us, so we hit some shops before heading back to the hotel. We were in for a huge treat that night! We checked in to the Grand Hotel Mediterraneo Florence and…

Villa Il Leccio Strada

We had dinner at a family home in the heart of Tuscany. Villa Il Leccio Strada in Chianti was absolutely breathtaking. We sipped prosecco overlooking the vineyards and toured the original facilities before settling in for an outstanding meal. Everything about that night was so absolutely perfect - except the impending end to our tour of Italy, that is!

After dinner, we stopped by the replica David once again before way too many glasses (bottles) of wine in the hotel lobby with our new friends. I could get used to this lifestyle…

La bella vita, no matter what time zone :)

Marriage > Dating

I vow to help you love life, to always hold you with tenderness and to have the patience that love demands, to speak when words are needed and to share the silence when they are not […] I vow to fiercely love you in all your forms, now and forever. I promise to never forget that this is a once in a lifetime love. And to always know in the deepest part of my soul that no matter what challenges might carry us apart, we will always find our way back to each other. 

- The Vow

Adam and I decided to get married soon after we started dating. We made plans before he even proposed. I'd always intended to elope - call me selfish but the thought of having a wedding without my father there depressed me. I honored him in my own way - we were married on my parents' anniversary. We spent Tuesday, August 27, 2013 parasailing, lounging by the pool, and talking about the life we would have together. I wore a dress off the David's Bridal rack and my groom wore shorts & a button-down. I had my something old (dad's lucky coin, sewn into my flowers), new (dress), borrowed (grandmother's ring), and blue (Swarovski crystal toe ring). My longtime friend, who is a minister, walked me onto the beach and I promised Adam I would love, honor, and cherish him until death do us part.

I'm not any less married than someone who spent tens of thousands of dollars and months of their life stressing over colors, seating charts, music, and what to feed the gluten-free guests. I never particularly cared about being engaged - being married to my soul mate was all I wanted. My rings, while gorgeous, are just a symbol. Marriage is more than jewelry and a party.

I see a lot of girls demanding extravagant rings and luxurious weddings. I just don't see the point. I'd have married my husband anywhere, with any ring. Your wedding day should not be the best or most important day of your life. Today is the most important day of my life. Every day spent married to this man is the best day I've ever had. August 27, 2013 was just the beginning. 

There's a reason we never got to this point with anyone else. We are meant to be.

We are soul mates.

Kickin It Old School

The family is one of nature's masterpieces. - George Santayana

Despite all the insanity in my early (ok, and mid) twenties, I've always been old-fashioned. My jokes about wishing I was "barefoot pregnant and in the kitchen" weren't actually jokes. I'm so enamored with motherhood I literally chose it for a career.
That being said, I NEVER wanted to have a child with someone I wasn't married to. Sad that at 26, people seemed surprised that I didn't have any children, despite my unmarried status. An employer (a hypocritical Christian attorney with 7 kids and a penchant for kissing his associate after too many drinks but I digress) once asked me why I didn't have any kids and my answer was, "I want a father and husband, not a baby daddy." I somehow impressed him with that answer.

It's an unpopular opinion these days. Suddenly I'm 'judging single moms' and 'pissed off I don't have kids.' Calm your britches, ladies. What's so wrong with believing in the traditional family structure? What's wrong with believing people should be adult enough to make a commitment to each other before they commit to bringing a life into this world and raising him or her together?

If we hear a 20 year old girl is having a baby, we might agree she's irresponsible but then we congratulate her, throw her a baby shower and don't think twice. Babies are blessings!
If a 20 year old girl is getting married…stop the presses. We tell her she's making a mistake. She's throwing her life away, there's no way she's ready for that kind of commitment.
Am I the only one who sees the problem here?!
No shame in believing that people should commit to each other, before committing to another person together. None here, anyway. If and when we DECIDE to have kids - it will be a purposeful decision two prospective parents come to, together.

*zero hate on, well, anyone, but definitely not single moms. Sometimes shitty shit happens, I know that.